Whenever Leslie asks me for the Latin names of any of our plants, I just give her the name of rappers.

Moan, moan, moan, but I am sodding tired tonight.  I've been working VERY VERY hard doing FULL DAYS at school, which may not sound like a big deal to you workers of the world, but I am part-time, so any time outside of 12:30 to 3:30 is voluntary work, although I prefer to consider it to be an investment in my future. I had my first experience of taking a meeting as a SENCO today, although with my natural diffidence, I let the two ladies from Brent Autism Outreach do most of the talking.  I can't believe how worried I was by this - I had a sleepless night last night!  How silly.

Anyway, it is done, and I have to brief everyone tomorrow, and make picture cue cards, and print out a bunch of stuff.  It is all go, teaching, I can tell you.

A bit more about the weekend.  My photo diary of Yarndale has not proved to be terribly popular, although I think they are pretty good photos for a change, so here are some words about Yarndale, to go with the pictures from yesterday.

Crocheted Mandalas.  People from all over the world made these, and sent them to lovely, lovely Lucy.  I tried.  It wasn't a success.  Let us pass over that.

Two lovely Lucys.  This photo was cut from the official Charlie Bear's travel journal, despite Lucy Attic24 being known to  thousands of people, all over the world.  She was good enough to remember us too, which was sweet.

Crocheted bunting.  Most are granny squares (triangles) and are very, very pretty.  Lots of people went to a lot of trouble last year, and the bunting must have been a real pain to put together, but it looks spectacular.

Hattie and Lucy by the Skipton canal.  It was another super day, weather wise, so they spent a lot of time running around in the park, letting me spend all my cash in peace and quiet.  Please note Hattie's completed cardigan.  She consented to wear it.  

Lucy at the Easy Knits stand, modelling her rainbow jumper from about two years ago.  Everything I knit the children is ENORMOUS, allowing for lots of wear.  I bought a lot of bright, bright blue, the shade that's just above Lucy's head, in an aran weight.  Watch this space.

October Unprocessed starts tomorrow.

We're the heroes of this story, we don't need to be saved

Weeks 31, 32 and 33.  It's all gone by in a bit of a blur, so the pictures are from random points in the last three weeks.

Biarritz, Biscarrosse, Disneyland, the Natural History Museum.  The fun never stops at our house.

Portraits of my children, once a week, every week, in 2014.

You're so wise. You're like a miniature Buddha, covered with hair.

Portraits of the children, once a week, every week, in 2014.

Both taken in or leaving the Isle of Wight.  We had a marvellous time; camping is great when the sun shines.

Today you're younger than you're ever gonna be

Portraits of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

Week 29.

The garden looks a bit like the Somme.  The lawn may never recover.  Hours of fun in about 6 inches of water.

You laugh until you cry, you cry until you laugh

I've missed a few weeks, what with one thing (laziness) and another (too busy).

Week 26:

Lucy at Sports Day.  She is very good at the things that involve following the rules, and not so good at things like running very, very fast.  We are going to work on that. 

Hattie at Sara and Reuben's wedding.  She had a great time, and hasn't taken that cardigan off since.

 Week 27:

I'm not sure this is from the right week, but I can't find a better one.  It's from my strike day; the best bit was when I went to pick up the children and we went for ice cream.  Very expensive ice cream.

Week 28:

Lucy has been doing ballet for a while now, and took 2 exams in May.  She's very young to be doing exams, but actually, she wants to do it properly and they help her focus on what she's doing and why.  I don't force her to do anything she doesn't want to do, and as long as it's making her happy, she can carry on doing it.  Her great friend does Modern dance, so Lucy's been doing it for a few weeks.  She's getting the idea of it.  Next year, both girls are going to be in a show in a professional theatre.  Brace yourselves.

Hattie on the tag-along.  Her legs aren't quite long enough to reach the pedals, and she didn't really enjoy it very much after a few minutes.  Lucy was her age when she started riding on the tag-along, which shows how much taller Lucy was than Hattie.

Portraits of the children once a week, every week, in 2014.

Whoever said orange is the new pink is seriously deluded

Hnnngh.  A couple of weeks of the 52 project.

Week 24:

Hattie's first ballet lesson.  She is a natural.  Do not think of this:

Lucy part way through another mammoth bike ride.  We cycled from West Ealing to Syon Park and back again.  That is 15 kilometres.  She did very well.  

Week 25:

Hattie at the Henley adventure playground. Faster mummy, make it spin more.  She wasn't sick, despite the enormous ice cream immediately before this.

Lucy learning to row.  Surprisingly, she wasn't very good at it.  I had to crop this photo, after my friends on Facebook pointed out the unflattering angle of Simon's legs.  The world is not yet ready for that picture.

Portraits of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

Wait, you want to make the cheerleading squad to prove to a girl that you are not a loser?

It's been a few weeks....

It's not that I haven't been taking thousands of photographs, it's more that I've run out of the energy to put them up on the blog.  I dare say you are all devastated.

The last few weeks have been a blur of ice cream, half term, face-painting, new hair cuts, bowling, Norwich, lost teeth, swings and rainy days.

Weeks 21, 22 and 23.  Collage courtesy of picmonkey - I love that site so much.

Portraits of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

There were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident

Some children can read, write and count at 3; other children can build a very stack of chairs and climb up to the top.

Lucy's friend had a Flower Power party, and we dressed up. Lucy originally wanted to wear the flower at the front.

Photos of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.  Week 20.  Where has this year gone?

Quick Dad, we're missing the giant capybaras of Uruguay!

Photographs from a sunny Bank Holiday in Rottingdean.

Hattie likes to explore the beach.  She generally comes back, pockets through of stones, which she hands to us to carry, as stones are too heavy Mummy.

Lucy catching bubbles.  I don't know what it is about bubbles; all children under the age of about 40 absolutely adore them.  Grandad bought us a bubble machine, it is all kinds of brilliant.  

Portraits of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

There is no human bliss equal to twelve hours of work with only six hours in which to do it.

Portraits of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

Week 18

Hattie likes to play by herself.  She takes over an entire room with her Octonauts, her dolls, her Lego people and the zoo animals, turning the conservatory into a wonderland, and woe betide the foolish parent who moves any of the toys.  I try to play with her sometimes, which she tolerates for a bit, eventually quietly and kindly removing the toys I was playing with and continuing her game in another part of the room; pointedly turning her back on her completely impossible mother.

Lucy is determined to learn to ride her big girl's bike, with no stabilisers and no help from us.  It is going as well as you can imagine, and I think a couple more weeks are needed to get the concept of balance, staying on and not giving up when you fall off.  She is only 5, so this is normal behaviour, but I wish she would accept that she needs us to help her sometimes.

Then the traveller in the dark thanks you for your tiny spark

Photos of my children, once a week, every week in 2014.

Bit behind, what with one thing and another.

Week 16:

Good Friday.  I think they were watching "Frozen".  Simon had been in America for a few days and had just returned that morning, jetlagged, tired, ready for home comforts.  The children were over-stimulated, tired and grumpy.  Synergy.

Week 17:

Term has started for both Lucy and I.  Things are returning to normal, in a way, except Grandad is staying, as Hattie's Nursery is still on holiday.  More chaos.  Before the storm, the lull.

Easter Monday, before the rain came.  We were all underdressed, considering. At least we didn't get too wet.  

She was already learning that if you ignore the rules people will, half the time, quietly rewrite them so that they don't apply to you.

A few days off turned into almost two weeks.  All I had to say was that my back was sore, and that I was busy and tired, so I stopped talking.  My back's better, and term is ended, and we had a few days in Cambridge, and I'm quite keen to start writing again.

Two weeks of portraits.

Week 14

Hattie is balancing on the step into the conservatory, using a strip from my Coco dress.  I have given up trying to explain her.

Lucy wanted a go at driving the car.  She's sitting on Simon's lap, steering pretty well.  Hattie had a go too, which was terrifying.  

Week 15

Friday.  The laziest girls in Ealing.  It must have been about half ten, and they're in my bed, watching Octonauts.  Marvellous, as Hattie says.

A bonus shot of Lucy with a life sized model of a polar bear.  Taken today, at London Zoo.  I didn't really realise just how big they were; they are actually quite terrifyingly huge.

Portraits of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

Maybe we could sell the show if we wrote in more special effects...like exploding socks!

We started the music and lit the lights; the girls didn't enjoy it as much as we did, Hattie got very upset every time we saw the WRONG KERMIT, and both cried at the end, so another jolly family day out.

Of course, we'd booked to go to The Muppets Most Wanted before realising what a beautiful weekend it would be, so we went to the park after church to enjoy some sunshine.  I spent half an hour or so walking around; my back doesn't hurt as much if I keep moving.

A Simnel Cake for Mothers' Day.  We took it to church; it was all gone by half 11.

Portraits of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music

Portraits of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

Not ballet practise, but Lucy warming up prior to doing the 30 Day Shred.  She is very keen on it, and as far as I'm concerned, someone in the house should be doing it.  A few weeks ago, Lucy was working out and a naked Hattie was jumping off the arm of the sofa onto me.  Life here is never dull.

A new game at the park. Hattie flings herself onto the moving roundabout, then locks and rolls off.  I don't think there's any else to say about that.

Insanity is hereditary; you catch it off your children.

Portraits, 12/52

See other people's admittedly far better photographs of their doubtlessly far less insane children here.

From all that I can collect by your manner of talking, you must be two of the silliest girls in the country. I have suspected it some time, but I am now convinced

What a technically terrible photo.  The tube was packed, which feels wrong for a Sunday lunchtime.  They eventually got a seat, shared between them, and sitting together, with holding hands, were as good as gold for most of the journey.  Too many commas?  Who can say?  Not Mr Gove, that's for sure.

A portrait of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

Week 11.  Where does the time go?

March Madness - 16/31

The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it

10/52

It was World Book Day on Thursday, so of course, Lucy celebrated on Tuesday and Hattie on Wednesday.

Snow White, off to the Big School; as if World Book Day wasn't exciting enough, they had a House Day as well.  In the end, she found it quite fun, but a bit overwhelming, and I think the whole of the Reception classes were a bit stunned by being in a different place and everything being that bit different.

Dorothy, very excited about going to Nursery in something other than her normal clothes.  She wasn't overwhelmed in the slightest, and now wants to dress up everyday.  

I'm adding one more, just because it was such a lovely day today, and I took the children to the Bunny Park after church.  It was even warm enough for an ice cream.

I could have done without Harriet deciding she was perfectly able to complete the maze on her own, without help and without asking me.  As it happens, she was right, and while I was racing around looking for her, she appeared at the raised bit in the centre, waving and very happy.  She didn't even drop her ice cream.

Portraits of my children once a week, every week, in 2014.

March Madness - 9/31

9/52

A portrait of my children, once a week, every week, in 2014.

Harriet and I spend Friday mornings together.  We both like sitting in Costa.  

I took this picture of Lucy this morning, before the rain came.  She is a bit of a wuss, and doesn't like physical activity much; it is very unusual for her to climb to the top of the climbing frame, but she did it, and she was very proud of herself, as was I.  I'm so glad she is getting more confident and stronger.

March Madness - 2/31